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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26769136">Fine</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeedsCaffeineRightNow/pseuds/NeedsCaffeineRightNow'>NeedsCaffeineRightNow</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT (Movies - Muschietti)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gay Richie Tozier, Richie Tozier &amp; Stanley Uris Are Best Friends, Richie Tozier Has ADHD</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 03:35:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,844</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26769136</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeedsCaffeineRightNow/pseuds/NeedsCaffeineRightNow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Richie has adhd and the Losers are beginning to see some of the less fun sides of it</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Richie Tozier &amp; Stanley Uris, Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris, The Losers Club &amp; Richie Tozier</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>128</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Losers' POV</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi, October is ADHD awareness month, did you know that? I did! Because I have it! And it's a pretty popular headcanon that Richie does too, so I wanted to write something where he experiences more than just the loud hyperactive parts of it! And maybe I project a little! Who knows? </p><p>There's going to be a second chapter where it's all from Richie's point of view</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>1. Sensory Issues</strong>
  </span>
</p><p>Richie had not joined them after school like he had said he would, in fact he had not said anything to anyone, and no one had seen him since Ben during seventh period.</p><p>So they did what any normal friends would do and went to go find him, starting at the arcade. Eddie and Bill went in to look, leaving the other four, Mike having caught up with them, to sit outside and wait.</p><p>"This is stupid", Stan said, kicking a rock into the road, "If Richie wanted us to find him he would have told us"</p><p>"But what if something happened to him", Ben pointed out, "We have to make sure he's okay?"</p><p>"He might have just gone home", Mike suggested and Stan nodded.</p><p>"Yeah", he said, "Actually, I'm going to call his house right now"</p><p>They watched as he stepped away from them and pulled out his phone, dialing Richie's home number, they had already tried to reach Richie. He was too far away for them to hear him, but from the looks of it, Mike had been right. The three of them held their breaths as he walked back over to them.</p><p>"Mrs. Tozier said he came home early with a headache", Stan told them, giving them all a little smug look, "Can we leave him alone now?"</p><p>"Who?", Eddie asked , he and Bill joining them now, "Richie? Do you know where he is?"</p><p>They told the two of them about the phone call and Bill frowned.</p><p>"B-b-but Richie doesn't g-get sick", he said confused, "Maybe w-we should g-go check on h-h-him"</p><p>"Or we could leave him alone because he has a headache and six people barging into his room will only make it worse"</p><p>They all looked at him and then each other for a moment before Eddie spoke up.</p><p>"Then we won't all go, only a couple of us will", he said, and Stan groaned, but agreed, wanting them to just get over it.</p><p>"Fine, but I'm one of the people going", he said. Stan had a pretty good feeling he knew why Richie had a headache, and it wasn't because he was sick.</p><p>"Whatever", Eddie rolled his eyes, and they all began to vote on who would go or not.</p><p>In the end they decided that Stan, Eddie, and Beverly would go. The others said they'd meet them at Bill's to study, though Stan had no clue why Mike was joining them for that, and they all set off in different directions.</p><p>When they reached Richie's house, Eddie was the one who knocked on the door, and though Mrs.Tozier let them in, she was a bit confused on why they were there.</p><p>"We just want to make sure he's alright", Beverly told her, and Mrs.Tozier gave her a sweet smile.</p><p>"That's so nice! Though he's not in the best mood, so please try to keep it down, okay?", when they all agreed she sent them on their way.</p><p>"Richie? In a bad mood? I didn't think it was possible", Beverly said as they climbed the stairs to his room.</p><p>"He's human", Stan said, it came out just as rude as he meant for it to and she looked rightfully sorry.</p><p>"Yeah, I know, sorry", she said, "He's just always so... you know"</p><p>"Don't worry, Bev, you'll get to experience the whole spectrum of Tozier emotions eventually", Eddie told her, and she smiled a little.</p><p>They reached Richie's door shortly after that, choosing to go right in and not knock since it would be so loud. The lights in the room were off and the curtains were drawn, making it almost impossible to see in there. But they could just make out where Richie was lying under his blanket thanks to the light from the hallway.</p><p>"If you're not my mother get out", came the very muffled voice of their friend.</p><p>"We're not your mom, but we are the next best thing", Beverly said, trying to be quiet but still speaking loud enough so he could hear her.</p><p>"Unless your a soundproof and lightproof chamber, that is not fucking true, Bev", Richie told her.</p><p>"Are you okay?", Eddie asked in the same quiet voice Beverly did.</p><p>"Fuck! How many people are there?", he asked instead of answering.</p><p>"Three", came Stan's reply.</p><p>"Staniel, if you don't get these fuckos out of my room in the next ten seconds, sensory issues be damned I'll have to kill them", Richie told him and Stan nodded.</p><p>"Alright, buddy, text me when you don't feel like shit", he said, pulling Beverly and Eddie out of the doorway. Richie didn't answer, but Stan knew he would.</p><p>The other two tried to argue that he wasn't okay and that they wanted to help, and Stan told them that staying away from Richie was the best way to help.</p><p>"What does that even mean?", Eddie asked once they were back outside, saying goodbye to Mrs.Tozier first.</p><p>"It means that you need to leave him alone", Stan said, "Come on, let's go join the others and tell them Richie's okay"</p><p>"But he-", Beverly started.</p><p>"He's fine", Stan said dragging them along the sidewalk.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>2. Lost In Thought/Zoning Out</strong>
  </span>
</p><p>The Losers were all sitting around in the clubhouse, Mike having claimed the hammock before the others got there, so they were all spread around on bean bag chairs and some throw pillows. They were just hanging out, and everything was pretty normal. The only thing being off was Richie.</p><p>He hadn't said anything since they arrived, in fact he had only made one joke since leaving school, and now he was in a corner, sitting cross legged, and staring down at his hands. They were all beginning to get a little worried at this very un-Richie like behavior. Everyone except for Stan, who had seen the way he was acting, and shrugged it off.</p><p>"Should we say something?", Beverly whispered, they were all sitting near the hammock so Mike could hear.</p><p>"I say we leave him be", Stan told her, rolling his eyes a little, "He's fine"</p><p>"And how do you know that?", Eddie asked, "How would you fucking know that if you haven't talked to him?"</p><p>"Because I'm his best friend", now Stan sounded a little angry, and Eddie at least backed down at that, "I know how he acts"</p><p>"E-eddie and I have known h-h-him j-j-just as long as y-y-you have", Bill reminded him.</p><p>"Yeah? So what? Knowing someone and *knowing someone, are two different thing", Stan said pointedly, "And I know Richie Tozier, and I am telling you, he's fine"</p><p>Stan looked away from all of them and back down at the book in lap, only looking up when Mike reached out to put a comforting hand on his shoulder, which was appreciated.</p><p>No one knew what to say to that. Bill and Eddie had known Richie since preschool just like Stan, and the others had known him for a couple of years now, they thought they were pretty close, but maybe they weren't if what Stan said was anything to go by.</p><p>"Maybe we sould ask anyways?", Ben suggested innocently, "It wouldn't hurt, and if Stan is right, he gets to be smug about it"</p><p>Stan didn't respond to that except for a small nod that if you blinked you would have missed and the others agreed.</p><p>"Be careful about it, though", Mike said, "If he is upset we don't want to make it worse"</p><p>"Right", Beverly nodded as she stood to walk over to Richie.</p><p>He was still sat in the corner, staring at his hands, biting his bottom lip as though he was thinking about something, and he was so still that if she hadn't seen his chest rise and fall, she'd have thought he was dead.</p><p>Beverly crouched in front of him, so that they would be nearly eye to eye, and reached out to put a hand on his shoulder. The second she touched him, he jumped a bit, gasping, then he looked at her with wide, scared eyes, before realizing who was in front of him.</p><p>"Shit, Bev, give a guy a warning next time", Richie said, but she was just glad his voice still worked.</p><p>"I will, sorry", she said, not all that sorry, "I just needed to ask you something?"</p><p>"Oh yeah?", He asked, "What's that?"</p><p>"Are you okay?", Beverly asked quickly, "Because you've been really quiet and we worried something happened or you were upset"</p><p>"Huh?", Richie said, and then he was quiet for a moment before laughing a little, "Oh, I'm fine. I was just thinking, I guess, got lost in my head a little. Just one of those days" Then he shrugged, he had them all terrified that something bad had happened, and gave them a terrible explanation, and then <em>he shrugged</em>. Like this happened all the time.</p><p>"What do you mean just one of those days? You're never like this, Rich", Beverly told him, and he looked confused.</p><p>"Yes I am?", He said, but now he sounded unsure, "Stan, tell her that I do this all the time"</p><p>"He does it all the fucking time", Stan said, still not looking up from his book.</p><p>Richie smiled and gestured at him, "See? I'm fine."</p><p>"If you say so", Beverly said, standing up now, but she still looked a little worried.</p><p>"I do", Richie stood up too, grabbing his bag, "And now I'm going to head out because I realize I am not very good company today!"</p><p>They all tried to get him to stay(except Stan) telling him it was fine, but he waved them off, walking to the ladder.</p><p>"Stan, I will see you later to do homework, and Eddie, I will see your mother at the usual time", and then he was gone, before Eddie could beep him.</p><p>"I told you", Stan said, smugly, "But you wouldn't listen"</p><p>"We're s-s-sorry", Bill said, but not like he meant it.</p><p>"Hmm", Stan hummed, turning the page of his book, "You should be"</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>3. Emotional Dysregulation</strong>
  </span>
</p><p>One thing they all knew is that Richie Tozier did <em>not</em> cry. Not usually, anyway. Of course he could, he was human, and Bill,Stan, and Eddie had known him during his formative years where that was a default setting for all of them. But they rarely saw him cry, and when they did it was usually offset by something huge. Like a murder clown. <em>Not</em> his drink getting knocked over. Except today it was.</p><p>Richie had been in a good mood from what they could tell when he accidentally knocked over his can of Dr.Pepper, it quickly spreading across the floor of the clubhouse. They all quickly got out of there, deciding to let it soak through the dirt ground and just let it dry over night. But the second they were all sitting amongst the trees they heard a strange noise. It sounded like a sob.</p><p>And it was only really strange because of who it was coming from.</p><p>Richie was sitting against a tree, his arms on his knees and his face resting in his arms. And he was crying. Seemingly over a spilt can of soda.</p><p>Before anyone could say anything Stan had already moved over there, telling them all to wait. He sat down next to Richie and said something that they couldn't make out since he had whispered it, and Richie must have replied because the sobbing stopped slightly and then Stan's lips moved again.</p><p>The other five looked at each other, all with varying looks of confusion and concern. They all wanted to go over there and make sure Richie was okay, and tell him it was alright, but they weren't sure why he was sad.</p><p>So they watched, wondering if perhaps that Dr.Pepper was a gift from his late grandmother, as Stan calmed him down enough to stop hiding in his own arms.</p><p>When Richie did look up, his face was bright red and splotchy, his eyes were swollen, and his glasses looked fogged up. But he wasn't crying anymore, at least not as much, and was even smiling a little at Stan, who just barely smiled back.</p><p>And though they were all very confused about what had just gone down, they were happy that Richie was happy again.</p><p>Stan walked back over to them, grabbing his bag. "We're going to go", he said, his tone challenging them to ask him why or what was wrong with Richie.</p><p>"Okay", Mike said, "Is Richie alright?"</p><p>"He's fine", Stan told him, "now". And then he walked away, joining back up with Richie as they walked back to Derry.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span class="u">
    <strong>4. Depressed When Understimulated</strong>
  </span>
</p><p>Richie had been off. They had all been stuck inside because of rain, but now they were at his house, and they could tell something was wrong. He just sat there, his usual smile gone, and he wasn't making any jokes or talking unless they talked to him first. Even when they asked him what he wanted to do he just kinda shrugged and told them they could choose, uninterested.</p><p>"Is he okay?", Ben asked Eddie who shook his head. All of them, besides Richie, subconsciously glanced towards Stan, who was just arriving.</p><p>Stan gestured at Richie who was scrolling through Twitter on his phone, looking kind of sad, actually, really sad. They all just nodded at his silent question of 'has he done this the whole time?'</p><p>Stan sighed a little and crouched down in front of his friend taking his phone. "Richie, what have you done today?"</p><p>"Literally nothing", Richie said, meeting Stan's eyes, which surprised the rest of them since he hadn't done that the whole time.</p><p>"That's horrible", Stan said dramatically, but like he was talking to a two year old, "Give me your hands"</p><p>"Stanny, I'm a big boy, I can wiggle my own arms", Richie said, but put his hands in Stan's anyways.</p><p>"You should've done that then", He told him, and the others were very confused until he started to move Richie's arms up and down like those weighted ropes in gyms, they were still confused but Richie's comment made a little more sense.</p><p>"Alright, now stand up", Stan said, pulling him to his feet, only causing Richie to stumble a little, "Go walk up and down the stairs a bunch"</p><p>"What are you? My coach?", Richie asked, but moved to do what he said.</p><p>Once he was out of the room, everyone turned on Stan.</p><p>"He was just understimulated", Stan said before they could ask him anything, "Because he's fucking lazy!"</p><p>"Fuck you!", Richie yelled from where he was, hearing the end of Stan's sentence.</p><p>"So he needed to run some laps?", Ben asked and Stan sighed.</p><p>"Something like that, I guess", He said, "Look, he's fine, just a little too full of energy"</p><p>"W-w-we already kn-n-new that", Bill smiled and they laughed, just as Richie came back into the room.</p><p>"Fuck you too, Billy", he said, and then turned back to Stan, "Am I done now?"</p><p>"I don't know, are you?", he asked in return, it's not like Stan could magically tell these things.</p><p>"Um...", Richie said, thinking about, before hooking an arm around Stan's shoulder, "Yeah, I think so!"</p><p>"That's good. What are we doing?", Stan asked, leading Richie back to the couch.</p><p>"We don't know, someone wouldn't give us an answer", Beverly said at Richie, who just smiled sheepishly.</p><p>"Oops"</p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <span class="u">5. Impulsivity</span>
  </strong>
</p><p>They were all laying out underneath the stars, spending the night at Mike's farm meant they could camp out if they wanted, and they did. It was quiet, all of the Losers lost in their own little worlds. That was until Richie said something and brought them back to the outskirts of Derry.</p><p>"I'm gay", he said, there was no emotion in his voice, he was simply stating a fact to the air. They all sat up to look at him. Richie doing the same a moment later, only then did they realize how scared he looked.</p><p>They were all trying to find the right words to say, and as they did they could tell he just got even more nervous. But they did find them eventually.</p><p>"That's great", Beverly said, and she hoped the smile she sent him could express how much she cared for him.</p><p>"Thanks for telling us, dude, we support you", Ben said from beside her.</p><p>"What he said, it means a lot that you trust us, Rich", Mike said.</p><p>"Yeah, we all love you, Richie", Eddie said.</p><p>Bill just stood up to come hug him. The other Losers weren't too far behind. The only person not joining in on the hug was Stan, but they could see that he had a hold of Richie's hand, never one for too much contact.</p><p>They hugged for a while longer, before returning to stargazing. Occasionally they'd glance over at Richie who seemed a bit lighter now, and they were glad.</p><p>Eventually he got caught up in a conversation with Stan, at least they thought he did, they could see his mouth moving and he would sometimes turn his head to look at him.</p><p>After a while they all kind of forgot about it, but not in a bad way, until they heard Stan say something a bit louder than he probably meant to and they all looked at him.</p><p>"Yeah, Richie, It's fine", Stan said, and they all watched as the two of them kissed, and as exciting as it was, it was probably the most confusing thing ever.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Richie's POV</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Last chapter, pov flipped</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this is more than double the size of the last chapter and I am not sure how, but I do hope you like it</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><span class="u"><strong>1. Sensory Issues </strong></span><br/>
Richie had kind of felt like shit all day, but it wasn't <em>that</em> bad, so he just dealt with it. That was until eighth period was about to start and Richie found himself holed up in the boy's bathroom trying to calm down. <br/>


He was sitting on the floor, near the wall but far enough from it so his back wouldn't touch it, his glasses in his hand, and his eyes shut tight. Too many shoulders had brushed his in the hallway, too many voices spoke loudly above each other, and there way too many flourescent lights for his liking. So he sat for a bit, trying to catch his breath, needing to calm down. <br/>


And he did a little. Once he had, he pulled his phone out, cringing at the bright screen, which in reality had already had the brightness down most of the way, turning the brightness down, and shooting his Mom a text that he would be home early. <br/>


Fortuanately, Richie had perfect grades and rarely missed school, so his Mom was more than happy, if not a bit worried, to have him home earlier than usual, and he was glad he had such an understanding parent. <br/>


He stopped in the office to sign himself out, the secretary didn't even blink twice at him, they learned a long time ago to not question Richie Tozier, just told him to get his Mom to write a note. <br/>


And then he left, shutting his phone off halfway there, the notifications from different apps, and his friends texting on their group chat making it vibrate was making him sick. He felt a little bad about not telling anyone where he was going, but figured it'd be fine, if anything Stan would sort it out for him. <em>Now</em> he did, feel bad for not sending him a text message. <br/>


But that wasn't something he dwelled over too long, because soon he was home. His Mom began to question him, but thankfully didn't move to hug him, she must have already assumed what was wrong. <br/>


"Got a little overwhelmed, I guess", Richie told her, "And my head hurts really bad"<br/>


"I'm sorry, baby, is there anything you need me to do?", She asked, and she looked at him with something between love and pity and Richie wasn't sure how to feel about that. <br/>


"No, I just need to lie down", he said, "In the dark, with like, as little noise as possible"<br/>


"Okay, Rich", She nodded, understandingly, "Do you want some advil first, or are you good?"<br/>


"It won't help", he shrugged, "But thanks, Mom" <br/>


She smiled at him and nodded, and then Richie made his way upstairs, not grabbing on to the railing like he usually would. <br/>


The second he was in his room, he pulled the curtains shut, and turned the lights out, before taking his glasses and socks off, having taken his shoes off downstairs, and crawling underneath his blanket, pulling it snug around his head. The pillow was discarded off to the side, deemed too much for him right now, which was fine since he had chosen to lay on his stomach, it was best he didn't accidentally smother himself. <br/>


Richie just laid there for a while, the feeling never passing, because things in life just can't be easy. He was probably there for almost an hour before he heard his bedroom door open. <br/>


"If you're not my mother get out", Richie said, vaguely aware that his voice was muffled by the matress and blanket. He was also aware of how rude he was, but that wasn't anything new, sometimes he was just rude and people were going to have to deal with that until he could figure out how to not do that. <br/>


"We're not your mom, but we are the next best thing", that was Beverly, and Richie could tell she was trying to be quiet. That didn't really matter though, her usually comforting voice was grating to his, currently, very sensitve ears. <br/>


"Unless your a soundproof and lightproof chamber, that is not fucking true, Bev", Richie told her, and he really wished she was, because that sounded amazing. Even just the noise from the air vent, and the little bit of light coming in from the hallway that he could just barely see through his blanket made his skin crawl and his head feel like it was going to explode. <br/>


"Are you okay?", Eddie asked in the same quiet voice Beverly did. Richie almost groaned. They had to know something about this, because they were being as quiet as possible, but yet they were here. How many of them were in his doorway right then? Richie didn't know and he sure as hell wasn't coming out from under the blanket to look. So he asked. <br/>


"Fuck! How many people are there?", Richie exclaimed, because he was a little irritated now, even though he knew they were trying to be nice, he couldn't help it. <br/>


"Three", now that was Stan, and he was speaking at normal volume, probably standing farther away than the other two were. He almost wanted to cry when he heard his voice, it wouldn't be the first time he had cried that day, but he still didn't.<br/>


Richie knew that Stan had probably tried to avoid coming over here as much as he possibly could, he also knew that Stan was probably scared when he didn't show up after school, they all were he'd bet, but that didn't matter. He would talk it out with Stan later, the others would have to deal, for now, he wanted to be alone, and Stan the man had showed up to help him out. <br/>


"Staniel, if you don't get the fuckos out of my room in the next ten seconds, sensory issues be damned I'll have to kill them", Richie told him, actually turning his head to the side a bit, so that his voice was less muffled than before. He couldn't see him, but he was sure Stan nodded, the other two were probably looking at him with those confused faces they had whenever he and Stan said something about their mental health. <br/>


"Alright, buddy, text me when you don't feel like shit", was Stan's reply, and then he heard some movement and his door was shut again. He hadn't said anything, but he knew Stan knew he was going to text him, he had already planned to anyways. <br/>


It wasn't too long after that when Richie found himself dozing a little, finally being comfortable enough to relax enough to do so. <br/>


- <br/>
Richie woke up at 6:22, and he was feeling a little better. At least now he could open his eyes without wanting to die. Somewhere in the back of his head he also realized that meant he missed supper, since they ate at 5:30, once his Dad was home, but he couldn't care right now. <br/>


He rubbed his eyes and sat up, reaching for his glasses and his phone, which had both been tossed on to the floor without a care. Sliding the glasses on his face, he turned his phone back on, giving it a second to power up. <br/>


Once it lit up, still too bright for Richie's taste, he clicked in to his messages, scrolling past all of them until he had come to Stan's. <br/>


He had only sent Richie one text after school, and all it said is 'Are you okay?', this made his laugh a little, the simplicity of it was nice though, considering the others had all sent him about thirty and they varied from checking in to threats. <br/>


Richie, still smiling, clicked on the message, and began to type a text a back. </p><p><em><span class="u"><strong>🐥Stan-The-Man❤</strong></span></em><br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: hi<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Hello, are you feeling better? <br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: yeah, i just woke up <br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Do you want to talk about it?<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: there isnt much to say? just got overwhelmed and came home<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Alright, do you want me to come over? </p><p>Richie was a little surprised by that, especially when he checked the time to now find it was a quarter to seven. </p><p><br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: you can, but its a little late isnt it<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: I don't care about the time, Richie<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: aw! thats so sweet Stanny!!<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Shut up<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: i will not<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: but you really do not have to come over if you dont want to<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Why wouldn't I want to? <br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: i was kind of an ass today<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Not your fault<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: yes it was, i cant just not tell people things<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: It's not, and no one is mad, especially not me<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: are you sure? <br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Yeah<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: I'll be over in ten<br/>
<strong>Richie</strong>: okay</p><p>He closed out of their conversation, and went to read the group chat, sending a goodnight text and letting everyone know he was okay, since he hadn't done that earlier. He immediately started to get replies. </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <em>
      <strong>BFFS x7 </strong>
    </em>
  </span>
</p><p><strong>Richie</strong>: hi, i just woke up, but i wanted to say goodnight and that i am fine and sorry for being a dick<br/>
<strong>Bev</strong>: goodnight! glad youre feeling better! i forgive you <br/>
<strong>Ben</strong>: It's all good, goodnight!<br/>
<strong>Mike</strong>: Dude, I'm just happy you're alive<br/>
<strong>Bill</strong>: what Mike said<br/>
<strong>Eddie</strong>: you were a dick, but it's fine, we're not mad, goodnight, Richie<br/>
<strong>Stan</strong>: Don't know what they're talking about, this is perfectly normal Trashmouth behaviour</p><p>They then started to go at Stan for that remark, and Richie smiled. He put his phone down and went to turn his light on for the first time in hours, and it was a little bright, but he was fine with it. <br/>


It was exactly ten minutes after Stan had texted him, that he heard someone coming up the stairs, and the next thing he knew, his door was open, and Stan stood there with a bag of chips and a puzzle. <br/>


"Here, your Mom said you haven't eaten", he tossed Richie the chips, "And I figured a puzzle doesn't involve anything too overstimulating, but it's okay if you don't want to do it"<br/>


Richie opened the bag of chips, setting it next to him, but not touching him, as he moved to the floor. <br/>


"A puzzle is fine, Stan", Richie said, and usually he would tease him about it a little, but today he was just a bit too tired to care. <br/>


"Great, because I just got a new one and it's 300 pieces", he said, setting the box down on the floor and sitting across from Richie. They didn't say much as they dumped it out and set to work, careful not to touch the others hand as they did. Richie ate his chips, Stan stealing a few of them, and then denying it afterwards, as they worked, and even though his day had been shitty, Richie's night seemed to be going just fine. </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<span class="u"><strong>2. Lost In Thought/Zoning Out</strong></span><br/>
Richie was sitting in the corner of the clubhouse, he knew that, it was one of the few things he was aware of. And he was looking at his hands, which were folded in his lap, but he couldn't see them, though he wasn't bothered by that. He also knew that other people were with him, but he didn't really care because right now he was thinking. <br/>


A lot of people didn't know he could think, and usually he would joke along with them, but the truth was Richie thought quite a lot. He often found himself wandering the recesses of his mind, or having an argument over nothing. There were occasions when he would even just sit there and replay and entire movie from start to finish in his mind, blocking the rest of the world out. <br/>


So yes, Richie Tozier could think, and right now he was thinking about nothing and everything. <br/>


It had started when he saw his friends outside the school, his eyes landing on Stan. Stan who was his best friend. Stan who Richie talked about everything with. <em>Stan who had kissed him last night. </em><br/>


And it was a nice kiss, and after it they both talked their feelings out, agreeing they should keep it a secret from the others for now, but they were going to try to date, they spent so much time together anyways. <br/>


Which made Richie think about their date later that night, they were just going to go to the movies and then get food, which wasn't abnormal for them, but he was excited, and it had been on his mind all day, but now it was even more prominent. <br/>


And thinking about that date, made Richie think about how nervous he was, and how when he was nervous he threw up and he really didn't want to puke on Stan because that's gross, and even though it'd be very on brand for him, he couldn't do that.<br/>


And thinking about his brand made him think about Your Mom jokes, which made him think about Eddie, which made him think about spaghetti, which made him think about Italian food, which made him think about pizza, which made him think about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which made him think about- well, you get it. <br/>


So when he felt something touch his shoulder, pulling him out of his mind, Richie jumped, hearing himself gasp then he looked up at who was touching him, Beverly. <br/>


"Shit, Bev, give a guy a warning next time", Richie said, and the scratchiness at the back of his throat made him vaguely aware that he hadn't said anything out loud in a while. <br/>


"I will, sorry", she said, not all that sorry, "I just needed to ask you something?"<br/>


"Oh yeah?", He asked, "What's that?"<br/>


"Are you okay?", Beverly asked quickly, "Because you've been really quiet and we worried something happened or you were upset"<br/>


"Huh?", Richie said, had they seriously never seen him like this? Probably not since he was constanly trying to put forth an effort to be outgoing even when he felt like shit.  "Oh, I'm fine. I was just thinking, I guess, got lost in my head a little. Just one of those days", he said after a moment, shrugging his shoulders. <br/>


"What do you mean just one of those days? You're never like this, Rich", Beverly told him, and he frowned up at her. <br/>


"Yes I am?", He said, knowing he sounded a little unsure, he decided it was time for a bit of back up, "Stan, tell her that I do this all the time"<br/>


"He does it all the fucking time", Stan said, Richie could see him out of the corner of his eye, looking down at a book as he spoke. <br/>


Richie grinned and gestured in his direction, "See? I'm fine."<br/>


"If you say so", Beverly said, standing up now, but she still looked a little worried. <br/>


"I do", Richie stood up too, grabbing his bag, "And now I'm going to head out because I realize I am not very good company today!"<br/>


They all tried to get him to stay(except Stan) telling him it was fine, but he waved them off, walking to the ladder. <br/>


"Stan, I will see you later to do homework", Which was code for date, which Richie could still not believe was real, "and Eddie, I will see your mother at the usual time", and then he was gone, before Eddie could beep him. <br/>


Richie found himself back at his house before he knew it, sort of aware that he had probably zoned out the whole bike ride there, but that was fine, now he was going to go get ready for his date. </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<span class="u"><strong>3. Emotional Dysregulation</strong></span><br/>
Richie couldn't say it had been a horrible day. Nothing hugely terrible had happened, but a fuck ton of little things had. First he couldn't find the shirt he was stuck on wearing, and he wasn't even sure why he wanted to wear it, but he had to settle for a different one. Then, during band, he tripped over his own shoelaces, faceplanting in the turf, the only thing keeping this from being too much of a disaster was that he wasn't holding his instrument. At lunch he had to sit with his science teacher for acting up in class. After that, in the hallway, he was called a few slurs by people he didn't recognize, but they apparently knew him. And during last period he was given after school detention for speaking up during class, even though he really had been just trying to ask a question. So when drink spilt out in the clubhouse, it was the straw that broke the camel's back. <br/>


Richie had barely made it away from the others before he finally broke down, partly aware that he was still close enough that they could pretty clearly hear him sobbing into his arms over a fucking soda like a two year old. He was just so fed up with everything! Why couldn't everything just be easier? Why did he have to get upset about the smallest fucking thing? He didn't even cry like this when his hamster died, but over a spilt soda? Sure! Why not? That made perfect sense! <br/>


He was still sobbing, and wallowing in self hatred when he felt someone sit down next to him. Richie prayed that they didn't touch him because that would probably just make it worse. <br/>


"Are you okay?", Stan whispered from beside him and Richie was both grateful it was him, and mad that he was seeing him like this, not that it hadn't happened before. <br/>


"It's stupid", Richie whispered back, because it was, and so was he, this whole thing was stupid. <br/>


"Not if it upset you it isn't", Stan replied, "What happened?"<br/>


So Richie just told him everything that happened that day. Because there was no arguing with Stan, especially not when he was right. He knew that it was probably hard to understand him through all the tears and the snot, but Stan listened so Richie talked, starting with the stupid shirt from this morning. When he mentioned the jerks from the hallway he felt Stan go tense a little before relaxing again. Finally he reached the stupid soda, apologizing for crying over something dumb. <br/>


"Richie, I love you, but if you apologize for having emotions again, I'm going to scream", Stan told him, and that made Richie finally look up. <br/>


He could feel the smile on his face, and it was the only thing that felt nice, the rest of it being wet and gross feeling from crying. He met Stan's eyes, and tried to wipe away whatever remaining tears were there, but it was a little futile. <br/>


"Did you just say you love me?", Richie asked, his voice quiet, even quieter than it had been before when he was telling Stan about his day, and Stan smiled back a little. <br/>


"Yeah I did", he nodded, "Is that okay?"<br/>


"Of course that's okay", Richie assured him, and then he looked back down at his hands, "I love you too, just so you know"<br/>


"That's good", Stan said, and they were silent for a moment, Richie still trying to stop crying, but now he wasn't sure if they were because he was upset or overjoyed. <br/>


"Hey, I think you left a shirt at my house", Stan told him, "We could get out of here and go look"<br/>


Richie grinned up at him, understanding the implication of his sentence, but knowing Stan didn't want to say it out loud in case the others heard. He nodded and Stan stood up, reaching down to help him up. <br/>


"I'll go tell the others we're leaving, and grab my bag", Stan told Richie. He said okay and just walked a little bit away from everyone, down the path back to town. And by the time that Stan caught back up to him, he had finally stopped crying and he knew everything was going to be fine. </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<span class="u"><strong>4. Depressed When Understimulated</strong></span><br/>
Richie had been stuck in house all day due to the rain, and so he found himself just lying around, playing on his phone, while some tv show he didn't know the name of played in the background. And he wasn't having fun. He was bored out of his mind but nothing he did helped, so he just stayed there. By the time it had quit and the others were supposed to be coming over, Richie was already feeling like shit, but he did want to see his friends. <br/>


He knew they were worried, since they asked him if he was okay multiple times and since he could hear them whispering about him only a few feet away, but he just sat there, waiting on Stan to get there so they would finally decide on what to do, scrolling through Twitter, which certainly did not help his mood at all. <br/>


He heard Ben say something, and then the door open, but his gaze was on whatever bullshit people were putting on Twitter. That was until the phone was being pulled from his hands and he looked up to see his boyfriend in front of him, which actually did do wonders for his mood. <br/>


 "Richie, what have you done today?", Stan asked him, and he almost wanted to lie, he would have if it was anyone else, but looking Stan in the eyes, he knew he had to tell the truth. <br/>


"Literally nothing", Richie responded, and even his voice sounded put off with the world. <br/>


"That's horrible", Stan said dramatically, but like he was talking to a two year old, which made Richie want to laugh, he just didn't have the energy to, "Give me your hands"<br/>


"Stanny, I'm a big boy, I can wiggle my own arms", Richie said, finally seeing what Stan was getting at, but put his hands in Stan's anyways, always willing to hold his boyfriend's hands. <br/>


"You should've done that then", He told him, and the others were very confused until he started to move Richie's arms up and down, waking them up a little, making him feel a little less numb. <br/>


"Alright, now stand up", Stan said, pulling him to his feet, only causing Richie to stumble a little, "Go walk up and down the stairs a bunch"<br/>


"What are you? My coach?", Richie asked, but moved to do what he said. He could hear the others talking as he walked between the first and second story of his house. <br/>


It was actually helping, and if Richie hadn't been so focused on not wanting to feel like garbage, he probably would have remembered to do something like this, though he supposed he was lucky to have Stan, since he didn't remember. <br/>


Speaking of Stan, Richie yelled, "Fuck you!", from where he was when he called him lazy, he knew it was a joke, and that if anyone but Stan had said he probably would have punched them. <br/>


When he came down the stairs, for the third time, he trailed back into the living room, hearing what Bill was saying. <br/>


"W-w-we already kn-n-new that", Bill smiled and they laughed, just as Richie came back into the room. <br/>


"Fuck you too, Billy", he said, jokingly, knowing that Bill was kidding, and then turned back to Stan, "Am I done now?"<br/>


"I don't know, are you?", he asked in return, giving Richie a once over. <br/>


"Um...", Richie said, thinking about it, before hooking an arm around Stan's shoulder, "Yeah, I think so!"<br/>
"That's good. What are we doing?", Stan asked, leading Richie back to the couch. <br/>


"We don't know, someone wouldn't give us an answer", Beverly said at Richie, who just smiled sheepishly. <br/>


"Oops", Richie said, and Stan frowned at him, but it didn't match the smile in his eyes. <br/>


"Let's play a board game or something", Ben said. <br/>


"That's fine with me", Richie said, and they all smiled happy to see he was feeling a bit better. And he was, of course he wasn't 100% right now, but he felt well enough to play Monopoly with his friends and that's all that really mattered. </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<span class="u"><strong>5. Impulsivity</strong></span><br/>
They were all laying out underneath the stars, spending the night at Mike's farm meant they could camp out if they wanted, and they did. It was quiet, all of the Losers lost in their own little worlds. That was until Richie said something and brought them back to the outskirts of Derry. <br/>


"I'm gay", he said, there was no emotion in his voice, he was simply stating a fact to the air. He wasn't sure why he had said it. The thought crossed his mind, he had been considering coming out to them for a long time now, but he hadn't meant to say it tonight, not when they were in prime hate crime territory. <br/>


But it was out there now, something in Richie's brain having convinced him it was a good idea to say it, and maybe it was, so far no one had said anything bad. But no one had said anything good either. <br/>


He sat up to look at his friends, everyone except for Stan who was on the other side of him, and they were all staring back at him, and he could feel his own nervousness coming off of him in waves. <br/>


Richie felt a hand grab his, and he didnot have to look over to know that Stan was smiling at him, even though he wanted to because it would probably be super comforting, but he needed to look at all the others. <br/>


Eventually they all began to say things, and they were nice things, thank yous for trusting them, and saying they supported him, and even that they loved him, all of their words felt like cement made up of kindness, coming to fill the pothole that had appeared on his heart in the last few moments. <br/>


Before he knew it, he was being hugged, it was Bill first, and then the others came so quickly he couldn't tell who came after who, but he knew he might have cried a litte, and Bill had hugged him a little tighter. <br/>


Stan had not joined the hug, he was not one who was particularly fond of being touched, Richie was the one exception to this rule, proven by the fact that he was still holding his hand, squeezing it comfortingly, giving his silent support. <br/>


And that made Richie wish he could have talked it out with him, he hadn't meant to say it, but Stan was a part of this whole thing, and Richie had come out without him, and without warning, but when he looked over at him, Stan looked happy, and so Richie allowed himself not to worry about that for too long. <br/>


The hug went on for a while until everyone went back to where they were before, staring up at the stars, and just enjoying the cool night. <br/>


Richie felt amazing though. He may not have planned this whole thing, but he was so glad it worked out anyways. There wasn't anything for him to be afraid of anymore and that was also a great feeling. <br/>


"Richie, I'm really happy for you, and you're like super brave, but now I have to figure out how to come out before they start to try and talk to you about boys and shit", Stan whispered and Richie smiled, turning his head to look at him. <br/>


"I'm sorry, it was kind of an impulsive decision", he said, "But you know, you could just piggyback on mine, right now"<br/>


"But that's your moment Rich", Stan told him and Richie smiled even bigger, "Plus I'm not worried about actually telling them, I just don't want them to try and set you up with anyone, you know how Bill and Bev are"<br/>


Richie chuckled, barely being able to make out the slight blush on Stan's cheeks, he moved a litte closer to him, and sat up, Stan followed his lead. <br/>


"I do know how they are, but I didn't know you could get so jealous", Richie poked him in the side, and Stan frowned at him. <br/>


"I'm not-", he began but then he sighed, "Okay I am, fine, I get jealous, but right now I am just trying to say that I don't want them trying to set you up on any blind dates"<br/>


"Well then lets just tell them that we're together", Richie said, and he knew Stan didn't think of it as being easy like he did, he didn't even think of it as being easy, his brain to mouth filter just sucked and that made sharing about his personal life ten times easier, his therapist loved that about him. <br/>


"How?", Stan asked and Richie grinned. <br/>


"If you don't want to say it, I could just kiss you", he suggested, and it totally wasn't because he just wanted to kiss his adorably jealous boyfriend. <br/>


"Fine", he sighed, and Richie moved to kiss him, but stopped before closing the gap, wanting to make sure he was actually comfortable with this. <br/>


"Are you sure? Because we can just wait", Richie said, giving him an out, very much unaware of the fact that Stan currently wanted to kiss him too, thier friends be damned. <br/>


"Yeah, Richie, It's fine", Stan said, and Richie closed the gap between them, immediately forgetting about the five pairs of eyes on them. </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Tumblr @needscaffeine</p><p>Gosh, I kinda love Richie/Stan, like this happened on accident, but I like it a lot.<br/>I hope y'all enjoyed this!</p><p>Also, please remember that I am writing some of this from a personal experience with adhd, though most people with adhd have these symptoms they may experience them differently or not at all depending on the type/severity of it. </p><p>Happy Halloween/ Spooky Month! And ADHD Awareness month!!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Tumblr @needscaffeine</p><p>And Yes, 4&amp;5 could be explained better, and they will be, in the next chapter :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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